Waiting for apple picking season: When waiting for God's timing seems like eternity

The best apples aren't necessarily the easiest to get to. Have you ever gone apple picking? Have you ever noticed how the brightest and juiciest looking apples usually require some thought to access? The apples on the ground are the easiest to pick up, but take a closer look... some are rotten and have worms in them. Some are mushy. A lot of them are picked up and thrown back down because you realize they're rotten...they're not right! They're the easy ones but not necessarily the best ones.

I recently went apple picking with a friend and I was walking down the aisles and aisles of apple trees, trying to pick the very best ones, I had a sweet moment with God. I've definitely faced my share of discouragement when it comes to dating; to say it's been a difficult road would be an understatement. Sure I've been on dates with guys, but none of these men were men that I could see myself with long term. None of them were men of God that I knew would honor Him and honor me in a way that I have dreamed of my entire life. 

As I was searching for the best apples in the bunch, I realized that like these apples, God has placed me on the top of the tree and it's going to take someone who is going to take the effort to climb to pick. Trust me sister, I understand it can feel mighty lonely up at the top of the tree when you see so many of your friends going off and getting married and starting families, but don't give in to the easy attention.

The easy attention is just that, easy. It's easy to entertain a guy who says all the romantic stuff. It's easy to go out on dates with the hot guy who's just looking for a fling. But you weren't called for the easy path, your path is so much more than that. 

God has his best saved for up top. He has placed you in a place that takes effort to get to. It takes effort, persistence and perseverance to reach the top of the tree...but these apples are untouched by the ground and the bugs that occupy it. These apples are ready to be picked, longing to be picked but are patiently waiting because they know that it'll be worth it one day. So don't sacrifice yourself and your self worth for the small bread crumbs a man might feed you to fall off the tree. Wait for the man who is going to put his heart into pursuing you honorably, selflessly and in a Godly manner. 

I'm Stationed not Stuck

Do you ever feel like you're stuck in a season of life? Do you ever feel like you've prayed to God to remove you from this particular season yet you find yourself still stuck in the middle? I know I have. I've watched countless friends enter into relationships, become engaged, get married and now start families and yet I'm still 'stuck' here. I've prayed that God bring me out of this season for many years but He has chosen to keep me here. It really made me start to wonder if this was just supposed to be my lot in life. 

Now my life is completely fulfilled as it is, just because I am not married does not mean my life is any less of value. I have been incredibly blessed to have a life that has been full of wonderful experiences! Due to the fact that I am single I have had the freedom to travel extensively, take up new hobbies, and even gain another degree...opportunities that would be more difficult if I was committed to a relationship. That being said, there was (and still is) a desire on my heart to have more. As a young girl I always dreamed of the day where I would be married and have my own home and family. I've waited for the Lord to bring the right one into my life, but it just hasn't happened. I've always looked at this situation as being "stuck" but a recent message by Pastor Steven Furtick has changed my view of this season. I'm not "stuck" here, I'm "stationed" here.

This totally changed my perspective. It may not be Christianly to admit but often I felt abandoned by God in my singledom; I felt like I did something wrong to be 'punished' and left in this season alone. Is that wrong to admit? Maybe so. Nevertheless, I felt like I was stuck in this season of abandonment from God. Yet Pastor Steven's message completely changed my perspective on this season. What if instead of being 'stuck' in this place of singledom, God has stationed me here for a greater purpose? What if God has placed me here to be a warrior in His kingdom?

This perspective and these questions have changed the way I look at where God has called me. What does He want me to do in this station? What is my purpose? What do I need to accomplish? The military are stationed in one place until they have finished their mission, and now I believe that is exactly what God has placed me in this season of singleness! During my quiet time this past week I've implored God to show me the purpose of this station. 

If you feel like God has stationed you in a season, I encourage you to pray to Him to reveal to you His calling for you. Lord, I ask that you show me your purpose for this season in my life. What do you want me to accomplish? Who do you want me to reach? What do you want me to cultivate? How can I better serve the Kingdom in this station of life? Use me for your will, show me the plans and purpose you have for my life. The Lord has shown me a few things He'd like me to accomplish this season and it has given me a new outlook on the time I've been gifted by God. 

If you've been stationed in a season and just don't understand why, I hope this helps you. I hope that you find a new vigor and expectation for this station. Let us be warriors of God and expectant of the lessons, blessings and purpose in your season. 

The Thankful Project: November 8th

The Thankful Project: November 8th: Words

Today's thankful project is being thankful for words. Immediately my mind went "well I'm thankful for the Word of God- duh", and then it went to "the encouraging words from friends" but I still just didn't have big ah-ha moment and my fingers start flying over the keys. I decided to look through one of my favorite boards on Pinterest for some sort of inspiration. The first pin there was something I pinned a few days ago and it was just like the Lord was speaking directly to me.

I don't post about romantic relationships very often but these words were just too good not to share. 

Let’s get this straight. There is a BIG difference between a Christian guy and a Man of God. The Christian guy might say that he loves you, but a Man of God will love God more than you. A Christian guy might text you Bible verse or have a tattoo of them, but a Man of God will live out those verses and have them written on his heart. A Christian guy might go to church, but a Man of God will praise and honor God in all his ways for all his days. A Christian guy might ‘accidentally’ compromise your virtue or purity, but a Man of God will protect it above all else. A Christian guy might be super attractive, fun or handsome, but a Man of God will have a beautiful heart, regardless of his looks. A Christian guy might be content to take you out, but a Man of God will go beyond the superficial and hold you up before God in his prayers continually.

There was a similar sermon by one of my favorite pastors, Matt Chandler, and he said... "Girls: the error they make is this really kind of “Well, he’s a neat Christian guy. I’ll marry him”. No. I think you avoid neat Christian boys like they’re the plague. I really do. You find a guy who is directionally headed toward godliness. Ok. Now, are they going be raw? Sure. Are they going to have weaknesses and flaws? Yes. Is there a desire and direction to become a godly man? Yeah that guy is gold.

I've become more and more increasingly aware of the amount of 'Christian boys'. I mean this is for men and women, but just because you have a Bible verse you Googled on your IG profile, doesn't make you a Godly man (or woman). To me, actively walking in a relationship with the Lord means: making every day decisions as if God was right there next to you. Spending time in fellowship with those who build you up and bring you closer to God. Praising and worshiping. Reading your Bible or a devotional or an app or something where you are getting the Word of God. Praying, whether that’s one, five or seventy times a day…making conversation with God. Bringing your heart and your desires before God and asking Him to show you His way. It is about recognizing your errors and sins and turning from your ways. It’s not just about church on Sunday and leaving Him at the door on your way out.

These words were just so poignant and truthful for the season of life myself and a few of my friends are in. I am so thankful that there are people like this that just spit truth and share it on social media, because just when I’m struggling and feel lost, God speaks in miraculous ways. I’m thankful for the Truth and for reality checks. I’m thankful for a network of women out there who continually share God’s truth for women and remind us all that honey, every little thing is going to be alright. 

Stop. Drop. Roll

I had dinner with a friend last night and we both opened up about these slumps in our lives. We're both in this season of struggle and it's so frustrating because neither of us know what to do. Life gets you down, you become exhausted and bored and are just going through the motions of it. But we were called to live a life that is full and beautiful and wonderful (notice I didn't say easy). This morning at work I was listening to an archive series from back in April of Hillsong London and it was one of those rhema moments where I just felt God speaking directly-to-my-heart. It was about living a victorious life and how our thoughts get in the way of that; how are thoughts and emotions play such a huge part in our life and yet if we don't take them captive and give them to God, we're destined for disaster.

If we want to have victory in our lives, if we want to be victorious, it first starts with us having a victorious mindset; having victory over our thoughts. In having victory in our mind is so important to living victorious. Because everything we do stems for our thoughts. Our thoughts determine how we feel, how we feel determines how we act, how we act determines what we do in life. Gandhi sums it up well when he says “A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes.” If we want to be victorious, we have to think victoriously. Our thoughts have the power to influence and control our lives. Our thoughts have the power to dictate and determine the course of our lives. Therefore, one small fearful or negative thought can actually have a huge impact in your life. Now fearful and negative thoughts, they will be present in your life, but I don’t believe they should be precedent in your life. And as Christians, I believe we should have full control over our thoughts, not our thoughts controlling us.

Colossians 3:2 says “Set your minds on things that are above, not on the things of this earth”. If we fix our thoughts on this, fix our negativity and fearful thoughts, and live out of those- we will cause ourselves serious damage. Our thoughts are like sparks, and left alone they can cause serious damage. So what we need to do is extinguish those thoughts before flames break out. How to take control of our thoughts, before our thoughts take control of us:

1.      STOP- As soon as a negative or fearful thought comes into your mind, you need to stop. You need to take that thought captive. 2 Corinthians 10:5 “We take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ”. Take that thought captive. Emotions say hurry, whereas wisdom says wait. Your emotions want you to respond immediately, they want you to react but wisdom says stop, wait and think about what you’re going to do next. Before you react on that thought, just think about things for a moment. You have a decision to either add fuel to the fire or to extinguish the fire. So stop. What are you going to do next?

2.      DROP-So we’ve taken that thought captive. The next thing we need to do is drop before God and give that thought straight to Him. 1 Peter 5:7 “cast all your caries, your worries, and your anxiety on Him because He cares for you”. Let Him be your first priority, not your last resort. Because what you give attention to, you give authority to. As soon as those fearful and negative thoughts come into your head, start throwing water over those sparks. Start extinguishing those sparks. Because that water is the Holy Spirit. You can ask for discernment and direction on how to deal with these thoughts. The more water you throw on these captive thoughts, the quicker those sparks go out. When you stop and drop in a real fire, you drop to protect yourself, to cover yourself. Spiritually speaking we need to cover our face and focus on God, and solely Him.

3.      ROLL- Now we’ve stopped, we’ve captured those thoughts. We’ve dropped before God and given Him our thoughts. Now we need to roll over and move on. Roll over and move on. It’s that simple. Thoughts are much like waves, you can’t stop them from coming, but you can choose which ones you’re going to surf. Be someone who is quick to drop before God, quick to roll over and move on. Don’t dwell on the thoughts you’ve already handed over to God, it’s such a waste. You don’t need to carry certain things, God will carry them for you.

Check out the full message here

Day 25 of 30: Hot Pursuit

Day 25 of 30: Something you feel strongly about

When I get passionate about something, it's pretty obvious, I get fired up. I have a heart for people and an absolute tender spot in my heart for God's creatures. I hate seeing people left out or made picked on and it's one of the reasons I became a sorority mommy for two years during college- because no one was standing up for the girls who didn't wear Lilly Pulitzer or have monogramed everything…but I digress. 

If I had to choose one topic I was adamant about it would be how a woman is to be pursued by a man. Obviously besides treating a lady right, I believe it is so important for a man to pursue a woman’s heart. Biblically a woman is supposed to be pursued and a man is to pursue her heart. I love that saying “A woman’s heart should be so hidden in the Lord that a man has to go through Him to find her”. Courting may sound old-fashioned to some, but to me all it means is pursuing a woman’s heart and not her body. He should want to ask her questions, understand what she’s thinking and feeling, discover her deepest desires and dreams all while keeping the physical side separate.

Call me old fashioned but I still find it charming when a man comes straight up to me and asks me out on a date. I don’t want this “lets chill” or “hang out” thing; I want an intentional invitation to go somewhere one-on-one and learn more about one another (and I don’t think its too much to ask of a man- any grown man is completely capable of asking a woman out on a proper date).

I believe it’s important that a man pursues a woman and provides her with a solid foundation for their relationship. That begins with talking. Talking on the phone, through texts, in-person: all of these lines of communication allow a woman to open herself up to him on a deeper level than just a physical side. Women also have the responsibility to be pursued. Especially in the 21^st century when women are incredibly strong and powerful, its that much more important for a woman to slow down and let the man take the lead. It may not be in our culture anymore to let a man open the door, order for you, pull out your chair, and pray over the meal but it’s Biblically-based that women are to be pursued and sought-after.

Women, let a man court you and pursue you. Let him take the initiative to go out. Let him chase you, don’t just give in to any first guy who shows you attention. Let him go after your heart, not just your body. Let him be courteous and show chivalry and appreciate it when he does. Ladies you need to wear the Armor of the Lord and cloth yourself in dignity. You should allow a man to take a lead, let him pursue you and don’t chase him. Let yourself be open to God’s will and His plan for your life but don’t place yourself in a man’s path in hopes you will change his mind… it doesn’t work like that. Dance with God and He will let the right man cut in.