Job 10: The Truth in the Darkness

When you start to question God’s goodness, what helps you redirect your thoughts to truth?

I get caught up in truth versus Truth. “truth” tells me that if I was 10 pounds skinnier I’d be happy. “truth” tells me that being bubbly and positive all the time will make me friends. “truth” tells me that I have to have those pair of shoes because it’ll fulfill me. “truth” tells me once I get married my life will finally begin. Well in case you need a reminder today ladies: those are L-I-E-S. it’s the world’s ‘truths’ but it’s not God’s Truth. God’s Truth says you are holy and blameless (Eph 1:4). Truth says you are loved with an everlasting love (Jer 31:3). Truth says that you are beautiful and your beauty comes from within (1 Peter 3:3-4). Truth says you can do it and He will help you through it (Josh 1:9).

These are some of the positive affirmations I have to tell myself daily [I have an index card full of ‘lies’ and ‘truths’ and constantly have to re-read them]. I’m convinced more than ever that Satan wants to kill our spirit of joy, because if we don’t have joy and love then we are not able to fulfill God’s command: LOVE.

When reading Job 10, we get a glimpse at the absolute despair that Job feels in his heart. I mean talk about a low point, he even says he loathes his very life (Job 10:1) and that he wishes he was never born (Job 10:18). I don't know about you, but when I get down and frustrated and just exhausted beyond repair, my attitude just goes down the toilet. I burn my toast in the toaster and suddenly I'm down this thought path:

- I burned my toast
- I can't do anything right
- I am a horrible cook, I can't even make toast
- I'm going to be late to work now
- I'm probably going to get fired because I'm horribly late
- I won't have a job and then I'll be miserable and penniless and have no prospects
- I'll be completely unwanted by an employer and a man because I don't have my life together
-I'm never going to get married

Anyone relate to Iris in The Holiday ... besides me?!

Wow. I went from I burnt my toast to no one will ever want to marry me in about 5 seconds. Our minds can jump from one thing to the next in a matter of moments and our attitude can go right with it. I find that I can relate to Job in chapter 10 here; I too go down the rabbit hole of pity and despair and it can get ugly. However, this rabbit hole is just a whole bunch of lies. Satan wants us to keep digging ourselves in these pits of lies because we cover ourselves up with darkness; and if we're covered in darkness it can be very difficult to see the light. 

I have challenged myself each week to memorize a new Bible verse. Trust me, not every week has been perfect and I haven’t memorized every single one but wrapping myself in God’s big T-Truth has given me an extra layer of armor against Satan’s attacks. This week’s verse is so incredibly fitting for today’s study:

“Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior and my hope is in you all day long” Psalm 25:5

If you’ve never challenged yourself to affirm yourself in TRUTH and LOVE, I encourage you to go pick up a pack of index cards, type them out, put them on post-it notes and set up a reminder on your phone to read these Truths over and over again. We must stand strong against the enemies lies ladies, because we are the army of God!

Job 9: Suffering but not Broken

Job’s anguish and desperateness stirs a deep sense of pain in my soul. To feel so close to someone, to deeply love them, and they appear to turn their back on you. I think any woman who has experienced a heartbreak, break-up, or divorce can identity with the utter torment that must’ve been running through his soul like a virus. As women who are intricately created to be emotional beings, it’s no wonder so many of us can sympathize with Job. I find that when I’m in seasons of despair and anguish I will play that emotional head game that Job could’ve gotten trapped in: What did I do to deserve this? What offense did I commit against God? How can I ever survive? I am obviously unforgivable.

However my understanding of God’s character has transformed through our relationship. Like any relationship there are many stages: excitement, getting to know one another, contentment, ups and downs along the way, re-learning one another and so forth. I’m reminded of 1 Corinthians 13:11 “When I was a child, I spoke like a child. I though like a child. I understood like a child. Now I am a man. I do not act like a child anymore” (NLV). My relationship has changed with God from being a ‘newborn’ Christian and therefore my understanding of who God is and our relationship. As I grow and my mind has expanded, I have been able to understand God in a whole new way…it’s almost like exploring a new city- every little thing is exciting and scary and wonderful!

When I was a child, I saw God as this ominous big fluffy cloud. Untouchable but present and evident. Through the ups and downs of my life I’ve seen him as a commanding authoritarian (do not do this, do not do that), a protector from potentially devastating situations, a supernatural healer, and even a loving dad-figure. Maybe you see Him in one of these ways right now. The thing is though, he isn’t one of these ‘hats’; he just is.

He is present (even when you don’t see him). He is protecting (even when it doesn’t feel like it). He is directing (even when you don’t know where to go). He is loving (when you feel unlovable). He is the healer (when doctors tell you nothing is wrong with you). He is a dad (to all sons and daughters). He is YOURS. He is yours, and you are His. Together you get to evolve and change your relationship. Who said there was a right or wrong way to see God? There isn’t! There is only one rule in this relationship,  and that is to L-O-V-E. Job had to go seek a mediator to understand God’s love for us, but we don’t even need to go anywhere- Jesus (THE Mediator) is in our hearts.

The Faith Journal: Romans 10:17

I'm starting this new project called the Faith Journal. I want to dissect a verse about faith and really study what it's saying and what it means and how to believe it. Worshiping to awesome Hillsong United songs, joining Bible Study, and doing daily devotionals is great and wonderful but I feel like there's something more. I want to have a greater faith in the Lord and I think that begins by getting back to the basics: reading and studying His word.

Today I want to look at Romans 10:17 in different translations and then delve into what God is trying to tell us in this passage. Links in the chapter for you to find more resources

Romans 10:17 (ASV) So belief [cometh] of hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ.

Romans 10:17 (BBE) So faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ.

Romans 10:17 (CEB) So, faith comes from listening, but it's listening by means of Christ's message.

Romans 10:17 (CJB) So trust comes from what is heard, and what is heard comes through a word proclaimed about the Messiah.

Romans 10:17 (ESV) So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.

Romans 10:17 (KJV) So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.

Romans 10:17 (MSG) The point is, Before you trust, you have to listen. But unless Christ's Word is preached, there's nothing to listen to.

Romans 10:17 (NIV) Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ.

Romans 10:17 (NLT) So faith comes from hearing, that is, hearing the Good News about Christ.

I've struggled with this concept of "hearing" God. I don't hear an audible voice, so how can I 'hear' God? When you're going through a tough situation and you silently say a little prayer, does a voice come over the radio and instruct you which path to take? Maybe it does. I know for me personally, that lightning-bolt-in-your-face moment doesn't happen. Does that mean God is silent and I'm forgotten? 

Romans 10:17 reminds me that I can't expect to be spoken to if I'm not listening to the right station. How can I expect to hear my favorite country song when I'm listening to the smooth jazz station? I've got to be in the Word. The Word is God's amplifier to us. He speaks through the words in the Bible. When you're sitting at your ropes end and not sure what to do, it's that small voice in your head that gives you peace or direction. Those songs on the radio that hit you like a bullet even when you've heard it 1,000 times. Those moments are God speaking to you and giving you a sense that He is there, He cares, and He is listening. We've just got to be open to receive it. Just like you can't expect to do well in school without studying, we've got to take time to study what God says to reap the benefits.

So faith comes from hearing, so lets read and hear what God has to say today. 

Perfect in the Imperfection

This devotional was from my June 1st Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young

I am involved in each moment of your life. I have carefully mapped out every inch of your journey through this day, even though much of it may feel haphazard. Because the world is in a fallen condition, things always seem to be unraveling around the edges. Expect to find trouble in this day. At the same time, trust that My way is perfect, even in the midst of such messy imperfection.

Stay conscious of Me as you go through this day, remembering that I never leave your side. Let the Holy Spirit guide you step by step, protecting you from unnecessary trials and equipping you to get through whatever must be endured. As you trudge through the sludge of this fallen world, keep your mind in heavenly places with Me. Thus the Light of My Presence shines on you, giving you Peace and Joy that circumstances cannot touch.

As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.

—Psalm 18:30

“For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.”

—Isaiah 41:13

A bad habit of mine is to go throughout the day with my plan, my checklist and my nose to the grind. 

[x] Crossfit

[x] Make lunch

[x] Return emails at work

[x] Schedule a girls night with friends

When I'm going through those actions I don't connect them back to Jesus. I do a devotional in the morning, I rush about my day, and then I end with a prayer at night. But the thing is, God isn't just there at my morning devotional and my prayer time at night: he's here with me now. He's here with me of every second, of every moment of every day. He has orchestrated my days well-before I've even started to create that days to-do list. When I'm working out, He's with me and knows when I'll face my hardest moments and want to turn back. When I'm making a lunch for work, He's already 'prepared' what I'm going to take. When I'm at the office and juggling 30 things at once, He is there helping me get through it all. All of it- He is with me. 

Yet I'm not conscious to it. I don't often enough glorify God in the small moments of life; subconsciously I recognize that He is always with me, but I don't verbalize it often enough. "As you trudge through the sludge of this fallen world (aka our every day lives), keep your mind in heavenly places with Me". If we remember that God is with us, He will never fail or forsake us, than it makes getting through the sludge a little bit less grueling. Not to say that our day-to-day lives will be a scene from a Disney fairytale, but His way is perfect, protecting and profound. In the end, it's comforting to get the gentle reminder that He is always with us, protecting and guiding every one of our steps. 

“For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.” —Isaiah 41:13

My name is...

I fall short on a daily basis; actually on an hourly basis... I take that back, every second of every day I fall short of the perfect Son of God. Exhausting isn't it? It's like a child learning to walk for the first time; they try and try and try and they just keep falling backwards. If we were born sinners, then there would not be one single thing we could do to change our damned fate. Ah, but there is something! It's not something you can buy and it's not an act you have to perform; it's called grace. 

Grace & Forgiveness: these two simple concepts are God's greatest gift to us. He offers us forgiveness and shows us grace. 

The enemy will use your sins against you on a daily basis! He will throw your past in your path when you're on the path God has planned for you. He'll splash your past on you like a cold bucket of water when you're resting in God's forgiveness. He will call out your past, your indiscretions, your shortcomings and will hold them out for you to feel again with a taunting smile and whisper those daggers of lies: "you're not good enough" "you'll never learn" "you don't deserve forgiveness" "it was your fault" "you're a failure" "God doesn't love you". But don't fall into this trap! Satan knows your name but calls you by your sin. He knows who you are, but will only look at your shortcomings.

God on the other hand, He knows every single one of our sins. He also knows every freckle, every hair, every tooth, every tear, every thought you've ever or will have and know what- he still calls you by your name. Grace is having a relationship with someone's heart, not their behaviors.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

God knows your sin but calls you by your name. He calls you wonderful. He calls you beautiful. He calls you His. He calls you beloved. He calls you blessed. He calls you perfect in imperfection. He calls you by your name: Forgiven Child. 

Can't You or Won't You

"I trust you, I don't trust myself" I said through gritted teeth holding on for dear life as I glanced anxiously at my coaches face. 

I've pushed my body to its breaking point and done things I would've been scared to do three months ago. I've put my body through some of the most physically demanding challenges and come out physically exhausted, bruised, calloused, beaten up and to the point of vomiting, yet I keep coming back for more. However, there are still things I can't do, I can't push myself to do it. 

It wasn't until I was lying there horizontally, about 3 feet off the ground and he was telling me to let go of my arms so I would just hang by my feet that I cracked. He kept telling me what to do and all I could say is "I can't". He squatted down and looked at my in the eyes and said "You can't or you won't?" and I didn't know how to answer. I hung there for a moment and tried to release my hands but every ounce in my being was terrified that I'd fall to the cement floor below me and that'd be the end. "Trust me" he said and that's when I realized I trusted him 100%- I believed what he was telling me was true. He could've said anything to me in that moment and I would've believed him and trusted him; I just didn't have faith in myself, my own body and my own mind. 

The Lord says in Isaiah 40:11 "Do not fear, for I am with you" so why do we fear so much? I realize how much fear has held over my life. Fear of the unknown, fear of the known. Fear of failing miserably, fear of succeeding. Fear of the past but also fear of the future. So much fear and so little living.

Within those few seconds I had to chose to trust myself and have faith that I would not plummet to the cement ground. I let go and guess what, I'm still here today and hanging upside down isn't as terrifying as before. I put incredible faith in other people and even after being burned multiple times I continually put faith in others, yet I have the hardest time putting faith in my own self.  "Fear is an idea-crippling, experience-crushing, success-stalling, inhibitor inflicted only by yourself" Sometimes we are the ones standing in our own way. Trust in the Lord, trust in yourself, because He is always with you.

Let your FAITH be bigger than your FEAR. 

Stop & Be Still

"The righteous person may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all." Psalm 34:19 

How easy is it to get overwhelmed and stressed out in everyday life? Little things suddenly add up and before you know it- boom- your plate has exploded. Getting to work on time, working out, packing a lunch, balancing the checkbook, paying bills on time, trying to figure out dinner, walking the dog, laundry, ironing, filing the car with gas...I know I don't need to go on because everyone goes through the endless checklist in their head on a daily basis.
  
However, although it's so easy to get caught up in the day to day monotony, it's important to remember who is in control. When life feels like it is spiraling out of control, it is so difficult to maintain order, maintain a gracious heart and keep a positive spirit. It would take every once of my being to maintain a graceful spirit when my life is falling apart, and that is why I constantly need God's Holy Spirit to renew my heart and cleanse my spirit. Don't stress about getting it all done.

I was reminded recently how busy everybody is, but someone asked if we were too busy for the Lord. How many times do we delay quiet time because we need to finish something at night, or skip church because we want a day to sleep in? I've found myself many times skipping out on reading the Word at night because I was so exhausted from a long day at work or not go to church because Sunday is my only day to sleep in. It was highlighted to me recently that when we listen to God and give him what he wants: our heart and our attention, he blesses us beyond our dreams. When we tithe, when we spend time praying, when we spend time in the Word, when we sit and listen and when we just sit in silence God uses those moments to mold, shape and change our lives.

Stop. Be Still.